Bibulb's Den of Lights

Q: Do I have to kill the snake?
A: University guidelines state that you have to “defeat” the snake. There are many ways to accomplish this. Lots of students choose to wrestle the snake. Some construct decoys and elaborate traps to confuse and then ensnare the snake. One student brought a flute and played a song to lull the snake to sleep. Then he threw the snake out a window.

Q: Does everyone fight the same snake?
A: No. You will fight one of the many snakes that are kept on campus by the facilities department.

Q: Are the snakes big?
A: We have lots of different snakes. The quality of your work determines which snake you will fight. The better your thesis is, the smaller the snake will be.

Q: Does my thesis adviser pick the snake?
A: No. Your adviser just tells the guy who picks the snakes how good your thesis was.

Q: What does it mean if I get a small snake that is also very strong?
A: Snake-picking is not an exact science. The size of the snake is the main factor. The snake may be very strong, or it may be very weak. It may be of Asian, African, or South American origin. It may constrict its victims and then swallow them whole, or it may use venom to blind and/or paralyze its prey. You shouldn’t read too much into these other characteristics. Although if you get a poisonous snake, it often means that there was a problem with the formatting of your bibliography.

Q: When and where do I fight the snake? Does the school have some kind of pit or arena for snake fights?
A: You fight the snake in the room you have reserved for your defense. The fight generally starts after you have finished answering questions about your thesis. However, the snake will be lurking in the room the whole time and it can strike at any point. If the snake attacks prematurely it’s obviously better to defeat it and get back to the rest of your defense as quickly as possible.

Q: Would someone who wrote a bad thesis and defeated a large snake get the same grade as someone who wrote a good thesis and defeated a small snake?
A: Yes.

Q: So then couldn’t you just fight a snake in lieu of actually writing a thesis?
A: Technically, yes. But in that case the snake would be very big. Very big, indeed.

Q: Could the snake kill me?
A: That almost never happens. But if you’re worried, just make sure that you write a good thesis.

Q: Why do I have to do this?
A: Snake fighting is one of the great traditions of higher education. It may seem somewhat antiquated and silly, like the robes we wear at graduation, but fighting a snake is an important part of the history and culture of every reputable university. Almost everyone with an advanced degree has gone through this process. Notable figures such as John Foster Dulles, Philip Roth, and Doris Kearns Goodwin (to name but a few) have all had to defeat at least one snake in single combat.

Q: This whole snake thing is just a metaphor, right?
A: I assure you, the snakes are very real.

"The Snake Fight Portion of Your Thesis Defense" by Luke Burns (via inevitablerecursion)
keyofnik:









#JESUS WEPT #WHAT IS THAT #FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT IS THAT #FORGET YOUMA I’VE FOUND ‘THE EVIL’ #DID NOBODY ON THE CRYSTAL STAFF HAVE ACCESS TO A CAT #I AM CERTAIN AT LEAST ONE OF THEM HAS HAD INTERNET ACCESS AT SOME POINT IN THEIR LIVES #HOW HAVE THEY NEVER SEEN A CAT #WHY DO THEY HATE YOU LUNA #JW watches SM Crystal #smc ep 2 #luna #gif warning 
isaacgoodhart:

Captain and Ms. Marvel!!

isaacgoodhart:

Captain and Ms. Marvel!!

supremesailorscout:

mvgl:

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air 2x09 - “Cased Up” (November 11, 1991)

FUCK

Ah, remember when this was a thing - good thing all that kind of worry is behind us now!

Consider your “FUCK” seconded, which I believe carries the motion.

blastortoise:

okay but when you have holocaust survivors and people who were activists during the civil rights movement supporting mike brown and then KKK members and neo nazi’s supporting the officer you should be able to figure out which side is the right one.

8bitrevolver:

A very small chunk of my Atari 2600 collection. These are the ones that I display because of the cartridge art. Pitfall and Donkey Kong have boring art, but I display them too because they are pretty worn out and I like how they look ;)

dcjosh:

riversong01:

fulbrite:

HOW TO BECOME A GODDAMN MAGICIAN

1. OWN A TABLET PEN

2. PUT IT DOWN FOR TEN SECONDS

3. ABRACADABRA WHERE THE FUCK DID IT GO

never have I laughed so hard

lol’

Me: *out for dinner with my dad because we were too lazy to cook*
Random Old Lady: *comes up out of no where with the most judgmental look ever* (will also be refereed to as 'ROL')
ROL: Isn't he a little old for you?
Me: Well, considering he's my Dad, I'd say that your a judgmental hag.
Dad: *chokes into his drink*
ROL: You should respect your elders.
Me: You should respect your youth, we're the ones who'll decide on whether or not to pull your cord in like, what? Five weeks?
Dad: *chokes on his drink again*
ROL: *storms off*
Dad: *looks at me with a disapproving look*
Me: What?
Dad: Come on, you and I both know it will be three weeks.
maz-z:

Tom Servo meets R2D2!

maz-z:

Tom Servo meets R2D2!

drfrankpoole:

kaylinthehuman:

stunningpicture:

Jupiter cake

I want to make one and stick lil dark chocolate rectangles all over the surface.
theandroid9000 thegreathal-9000 drfrankpoole dr-bowman
EAT THE MONOLITH

drfrankpoole:

kaylinthehuman:

stunningpicture:

Jupiter cake

I want to make one and stick lil dark chocolate rectangles all over the surface.
theandroid9000 thegreathal-9000 drfrankpoole dr-bowman

EAT THE MONOLITH